Tag: bdsm

  • A stab at Definitions

    Discussions surrounding poly, friends with benefit, open marriage and other areas has lead to me thinking more about my definitions. Like everything this is my personal opinion based on discussions with numerous different people, male and female in the lifestyle.

  • Firsts in my mind

    We have had a lot of firsts.  We have done orgy, group sex, among other things.  The rule for Krystalla and myself is that we have to have done it first before it can be done with anyone else without each other.  Fair rule since we want to enjoy the experience for the first time…

  • Unique can not be forgotten

    For past few weeks I have had the good fortune of seeing a few of my fwb.  Timing has actually worked out, although it seems like when it rains it pours.  This week especially has been busy.  The sex has been great as well, but there has been one common factor of late that I…

  • Fantasy – less

    I don’t have any fantasies.  Well I did, when we first started.  One evening during the first month that we opened up so long ago we talked about it.  Saying to each other what we wanted to try or thought we would try.  Within the first few years I did pretty much everything that I…

  • 50 Shades of voices

    I have read the book and the writing was horrible. After seeing the movie I found I liked it better. Maybe because of the lack of suffering such a badly written book. I couldn’t even continue reading the second (although I am now considering it).  I did discover one thing that did surprise me. Control.…

  • The good and the bad

    The hardest part in the lifestyle is how things evolve. My wife found BDSM with our poly couple. I never would have thought this would be something she is interested in.  Nor something I can do myself. Sure I have dabbled when I was younger with control.  Voice and maybe holding a girls hands down. …

  • BDSM test – how accurate?

    I have no idea how this came up, or where the quad found this but there is a test to see how kinky you are. Since they all did it, well I had to see how I fit onto the scale. Surprisingly, there was not really anything to surprising about the results for myself.

  • Exposing my inner thoughts on the dark side

    Unknown to me when I was younger, I was dominate when having sex.  I would direct and control the woman with my voice.  Fast forward to now and it something that I am struggling with.  Not the verbal part, that is coming back in stages since I turned it off when I married my wife.…

  • Choke surprise

    Choke surprise

    Choking I only do in my jiu jitsu class. I know to perform lots of different types. Rear naked, head in arm, and the famous guillotine to name a few. I would never it do it for pleasure which is why I was caught of guard hearing my wife was choked during sex this past…

  • Tied up in my search for meaning

    Discovering yourself is an interesting challenge.  You don’t know what it is you are looking for until you come across it.  Like most things you usually are introuduced to something new.  This has been my experience for the past few years.  As to what I have tried, well, I will try almost anything once, twice…